Washington DC Mommy blogger

Summer 2013: The Staycation Must-Do

May 21, 2013

With the unofficial start to summer 2013 just days away, I’ve seen so much traffic on local listservs about where to go this summer that doesn’t require airfare and doesn’t involve the inevitable traffic that comes with crossing the Bay Bridge. So no better time than right now to tip you off to my absolute favorite spot for a weekend away – Maryland’s Deep Creek Lake.

Maryland’s Deep Creek Lake – pure bliss

If you haven’t been, I urge you to put it on the top of your list. If you’ve been, then I am certain you are nodding your head in agreement. Here’s why:

1. It’s only three hours away

2. The drive is lovely – you probably had no idea Maryland is so mountainous

3. You don’t have to worry about the horrid Bay Bridge traffic

4. You don’t have to worry about fighting someone for a parking spot or waiting in line at a restaurant.

5. You just might have great hair for a weekend. Sure, we all love the tousled beach look but does it ever look in reality how you picture it in your head? Meanwhile up in Deep Creek, it could be 15 degrees cooler and no humidity. Your hair will thank you. To your hair, I say: You’re Welcome.

6. There’s a year-round Mountain Coaster – along with a totally cool newly done man-made white water rafting course, a chipmunk challenge course for kids and hiking on top of Wisp Mountain and obviously boating, jet skiing and general lake happiness – on the lake.

7. The Honi-Honi Bar. There is no better people watching and general lounging on the east coast. Trust moi. C’est vrai. You can dock your boat, let the kids play on the grassy area, and enjoy a beverage while you relax and soak in some live music.

Should I keep going or are you sold?

We go up every year over Labor Day weekend with three other families – 8 kids in total. It is a summer highlight. Many people have asked – how do we figure out where to stay???? What do you look for in a house? How do you decide?

Fret not kittens, I’m ready to reveal my trade secrets. There are two main realty companies up there for home rentals but I’d urge you to go with Railey Mountain Lake Vacations. They have the biggest inventory in the area and their staff are knowledgeable about each property, can give you specific information, can talk to you about how it might suit your group – for instance, I was zeroing in on one house and the staff were able to tell me that though it wasn’t obvious from the pictures online, there was a steep path down to the dock and the lake that might be hard for tired children to climb after a long day or toddlers. Read: are you prepared to carry the kids up the slope?

The kids LOVE the pontoon boat trip…note – she wasn’t the reason we almost sank it.

I would have never known it from the pictures so I was so glad I picked up the phone and actually called. Another reason to call – they have relationships with vendors in the area – like say boating companies that rent pontoon boats, they can schedule tee times, or reserve other activities and make great suggestions. If you are going, you’ll want to call ahead and reserve a boat in advance, at least that was our experience with the busy pain relief Labor Day weekend.

And though we literally almost sank our boat a few summers ago, it is absolutely a must-do when heading to Deep Creek in the summer. (To clarify: the rent a pontoon boat part, not the sinking it part. That, I wouldn’t advise).

When searching for a house, our group’s rules were as follows:

1. Hot tub

2. Fire pit for s’mores

3. Lake front or Lake Access (meaning there is a road between your house and the lake but you still have a dock – these homes are generally cheaper)

4. What happens in Deep Creek, stays in Deep Creek.

#kidding

#I’mABigMouth

One year we looked for a house that had enough bedrooms for the adults and for the kids. Then the kids all ended up in our bedrooms and we had wasted space and wondered what we were paying for. Last summer, we settled on a house with multiplemaster suites and less bedrooms. When the kids are older, we’ll go for the bigger homes again. This summer, we’re again renting a property with a few master suites but now we also are going for an unobstructed view of the lake. In the past, we’ve had a road in between, then tons of trees, last year a bit of a slope down – which frankly is a good thing too because it limits the chances of a rogue kid going running into the lake without adult supervision – but now the kids are older and we are ready for the flatness and the unobstructed view.

Another thing to consider, on the off-chance the adult members of the group might ~~play Flip Cup and other age-inappropriate drinking games~~ get a little rowdy at night, consider the outdoor living space. Is the only outdoor space the deck right off a bunch of rooms where the kids are sleeping? Maybe not the best house (though we’ve done it and the kids slept through it). Instead, is there a lower deck further away from the bedrooms, is there a house where a master suite isn’t right off the hot tub, is there outdoor living space that separates your ~~juvenile~~ adult antics from the sweet innocent sleeping children?

Don’t leave home without the Sister Wives. Note – deck is a few feet from a bedroom door. #badparenting

Strategery, friends.

Speaking of friends, bring your sister wives. Part of the reason the annual Wired Momma get-away to Deep Creek Lake is such a summer treat is because of my rule of thumb: always bring your sisters wives and the manny’s. This way – you have plenty of time relaxing on the deck and gossiping, while the manny’s are on hand should the children need some adult supervision.

Again, strategery.

Finally, we’ve also really enjoyed some time at the Deep Creek State Park – where we docked our boat, had a great picnic lunch and let the kids play on the beach, in the water and on the playground. The other state park we’ve loved is Swallow Falls Park, where you can hike to the tallest waterfall in Maryland, something my kids really enjoyed as they hadn’t yet seen a waterfall.

Bottom line – if your budget doesn’t include a weekly rental at the beach this year or you’ve not yet explored western Maryland, then my advice is to head up to Deep Creek Lake and enjoy it!!

For more of my fav summer must-visits, must-haves and general summer survival tips, be sure to “Like” the Wired Momma FB page. The fun is only just beginning….

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Summer Survival with Kids, Summer Travel Tips

Did Disney Change Merida? A view from her official coronation at Walt Disney World

May 16, 2013

Merida with Queen Elinor, Olympian Gabby Douglas and her mom.

“If you had a chance to change your fate, would you?” Merida asks us in her Scottish accent.

Lately, it seems the question isn’t – can you change your fate – but can you Barbie-fy Merida? Is that really happening – so many of us are wondering?

But first – before I get to what I experienced first-hand at Walt Disney World and Merida’s official coronation on Saturday, some background.

To know where I am coming from, you need to know a bit more about where me and my girls stand with the Disney Princesses.

Myself, I am a self-dubbed “M” gal. I adore Mulan and Merida. They are opinionated, loyal, strong and independent.

I have two little girls, two little red-headed girls, in fact, and both absolutely swoon over Merida. Especially my four-year-old. Ironically, last summer when my youngest was just three, we actually went to the movies to see “Brave” and ended up leaving a few minutes before the ending because they both were terrified. But their love for Merida never wavered. Even through the scary bear scenes.

It’s primal, really, when little kids fall in love with fictional characters. My now four-year-old instinctively knows she loves Merida to the core. She is spunky and feisty. Merida is definitely spunky and feisty. She is brave and strong. My little one is brave and strong. She is confident and smart, my little one is also confident and smart. And I secretly fear, much like her idol Merida, she will defy me at every turn when she reaches the tween-teen years. I sat through “Brave” last summer wondering if this was foreshadowing my future – minus me being able to catch a fish with my paws when I am turned into a bear.

But little kids, when it comes to their favorite characters, they can’t eloquently articulate why they love that character – they just know. That princess IS them. After Christmas, my little one wore her Merida dress to its threads. She slept in it, she wore it to school, she wore it at home. It’s now ripped, torn, dirty and it is part of her. It is perfectly Merida, really.

So when the news broke on the eve of the Disney Social Media Moms conference, which I attended, that Disney was going to change the way Merida looks, my blood boiled. I first spotted it on the A Mighty Girl Facebook page. Then came the Change.org petition with the image of the shocking transformation of Merida from sassy and child-like to glittery, adult looking and Barbie-like in physique. Worse – the image showed Merida in the very dress she hated, now almost glittery and sparkling. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. I was incredulous. I shared the Change.org petition on my blog Facebook page and I signed it.

But I also kept wondering – is this true? Doesn’t Disney risk LOSING money by so dramatically changing the brand of Merida? And Disney is a lot of things, but they are also a corporation trying to make money. Lets be realistic here.

Frankly, as my head was swirling with all this news, I couldn’t believe my luck that I was headed straight to Disney World with an exclusive invitation to attend Merida’s coronation on Saturday. I was determined to find the right person to talk too and ask about Merida’s change, even if it meant ruining my reputation and never being invited back to the Disney conference again. Merida is important in our house – so I had to find out what was going on.

The conference began last Thursday night and it wasn’t until Saturday morning that I had the chance to find the right person to talk to about Merida – and to find out if it was all true. Along the way I followed all the articles about Merida and tracked the growing list of signatures on the Change.org petition.

Was it true, I asked? Could they really be dramatically changing this new character – the soon to be official 11th Disney princess – who was blazing a new path for Disney princesses?

Shortly before the official coronation of Merida in the Magic Kingdom, which took place at the base of Cinderella’s castle, I found Margita Thompson, who works in public relations for Disney. She was nestled next to the table of Merida merchandise at our conference breakfast. Merchandise which actually didn’t look like the godforsaken image floating around the Internet – that had all of us seeing red. She was ready to answer any questions and was well aware of all the buzz flying around the Internet. Instead of talking, however, the proof was in the pudding – she turned my attention to the new merchandise.

Admittedly, Merida didn’t look exactly like she did in the movie but she also didn’t look like a glittery, slutty Barbie. What struck me the most was this: Merida looked different in all the items depending on what you were buying and who you were buying it for. Looking for a Merida doll for a toddler? Then she looks like a baby with a round toddler-like face. Looking for a Merida-Barbie like doll – then she has more of a Barbie appearance. Looking for some clothing? She looks less child-like and more Disney Princess like. You can see and judge for yourself – I took all of the above pictures- of the official Merida merchandise on display at Walt Disney World on the morning of Merida’s coronation.

The official Disney statement about the Merida change is as follows: “Merida exemplifies what it means to be a Disney Princess through being brave, passionate, and confident and she remains the same strong and determined Merida from the movie whose inner qualities have inspired moms
and daughters around the world.”

But here’s what I discovered on Saturday I discovered the Merida we know, the Merida we love – at her coronation. There was nothing different about Merida in the official Disney ceremony – she was MERIDA.

Not a prissy, frilly, sparkly Merida. She even walked like Merida – almost more of a stomp.

Merida riding in on Angus for her official coronation at Walt Disney World on Saturday May 11

Behind bagpipes, with Scottish music blaring through the park, in rode Merida, into the Magic Kingdom, on Angus, in her dark green velvety dress – the dress that she adored . You can see it here for yourself…keep in mind…I am no professional videographer but here’s what I captured – but if you are a sucker for bagpipes, you’ll suck it up:

Right in front of us was the strong, independent Merida that we fell in love with. She wasn’t riding side-saddle in a sparkly dress, cooing at men and giggling, as you’d imagine that adult-like character version of Merida would – that is flying around the Internet.

And while I stood a few steps from the stage, I can tell you that it was Olympian Gabby Douglas who kicked off the ceremony. The very young girl who dazzled young girls across the world with her strength and athleticism last summer during the Olympics. Could there have been a better role model for young girls to introduce Merida than Gabby Douglas and her mother? Wasn’t this exactly the message we want to send our girls? This was a Disney function – no one else’s – and it was right on message with the Merida from the movie.

On the stage, with the other 10 official Disney Princesses, Merida proclaimed the following:

“I am strong. I am brave. I am Merida. I am a princess.”

And low and behold, I actually captured Merida’s proclamation here – you should definitely watch this part:

My shot of all 11 Disney Princesses

Under the blazing heat, sun beating down on us before 10am on Saturday, I can tell you that Merida’s coronation was authentic and my girls were mesmerized. When Queen Elinor took the stage, we all were reminded that not only is Brave about Merida’s strength and courage in blazing her own path and changing her fate but it is about her rebellion and love for her mother. It was a perfect Disney moment on the eve of Mother’s Day and I was hooked (and sweating profusely, btw). Were the 11 Princesses sweating – you can trust I was obsessively wondering, because I was a sweaty, red-faced mess and we hadn’t even gotten to one ride yet.

The bottom line is this: I can’t tell you what to think of the Merida merchandise now. You’ll see the merchandise in the stores. I can only tell you that I went into the conference really fired up and left completely inspired. I don’t even know if any of these changes are actually happening….Jezebel is reporting Disney has now reversed its decision. Here is the Disney response to that reporting: “The artwork used on Merida’s official social media sites has always been the imagery from the movie. We routinely use different art styles with our characters and this rendition of Merida in her party dress was a special one-time effort to commemorate her coronation.”

Here’s what I know: This is what our Democracy is all about – which is another valuable lesson for our kids – in my opinion. I am grateful for sites like A Mighty Girl who provide for us a centralized place to find strong role models for our girls, I am grateful for grassroots organizations like Change.org that allow us to sign petitions and collectively send a unified, strong, powerful message to corporations like Disney that we want and need more princesses like Merida and I am grateful to Disney for organizing Merida’s official coronation with the spirit and strength of Merida in mind and for showcasing yet another strong, brave girl, Olympian Gabby Douglas.

Gymnastics gold medalist Gabby Douglas attends a regal celebration to welcome the newest princess, the brave and passionate Merida, from Disney∙Pixar’s “Brave,” to the Disney Princess royal court May 11, 2013, at Cinderella Castle in Magic Kingdom at Walt Disney World Resort in Lake Buena Vista, Fla.

Merida stood on stage as the strong, brave and independent girl that she is and my girls heard that message and saw that green dress. From my jaded, skeptical view-point, it seemed that Disney is listening.

Now it is up to us to only buy the merchandise we believe truly exemplifies Merida’s character and to constantly talk with our kids about the characteristics that make Merida so special and so unique. I’m curious what you think – has it been overblown? Do you agree or disagree? And naturally, I’d love for you to hit “Like” on the old Wired Momma Facebook page – where we often have really great conversations.

Disclosure: I attended the Disney Social Media Moms Conference, which is an invite-only conference. My family paid a conference fee to attend and in exchange we were given park passes at a greatly reduced rate, three nights in a hotel and invited to meals and Merida’s coronation. My opinions here are all my own, you can be sure of that.

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Disney Princesses

Know A Mom? Send her this gift

May 9, 2013

I’ve been thinking a while about what I could give you for Mother’s Day. True, I did lay out very clearly for the husbands out there what they could be doing – at no expense to anyone – in my riveting Father’s Guide to Mother’s Day. So you are, indeed, welcome for that.

But what else could I give you, my dear readers, for this most farcical of holidays?

A PICTURE POST, of course. For what are we, friends, but sleep deprived, short on attention, in need of a laugh, faking it til we make it, gals? With that, I offer you a smattering of my favorite mans health images from around the vast interweb:

Remember this one from New Years? Hope you’re sticking to it:

How about these toddlers? I think we can agree they are a national representation of all that is being a toddler and a reminder that misery does love company:

Here are some truths about style and exercise:

And I present to you everywoman and her home life:

And finally – seeing as how it is Mother’s Day – the inevitable happens to all of us:

As for gifts, I absolutely believe you are this:

Happy Mother’s Day!!! Give moi a gift and “Like” all that is fun – the Wired Momma Facebook page.

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Humor

Dad or Alive Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

May 7, 2013

I am excited about today’s post for a number of reasons. First and foremost, I love people who are funny.

Two, I’m enamored with Dads who are open about fatherhood and are willing to write about it. Maybe because Mr. Wired Momma excels at many, many things but writing and being overly communicative about adjusting to life as a father, isn’t one of his things, so I find it really intriguing when another Dad offers up a confession or two.

Three, I’m writing today about a friend and local blogger. Adrian Kulp, hilarious talent behind the widely read blog Dad or Alive, also holds the distinction of being the only DC man who can call himself a Listen To Your Mother DC cast member, and today can add published author to his resume. Adrian has a brand new book out: Dad or Alive: Confessions of an Unexpected Stay-At-Home Dad. Not only is he is living my dream of being a published author, I like him a ton – so I’m just super excited to share this interview with him and spread the word about his must-read book on fatherhood.

First about the book. Adrian’s publisher sent me his book last month. It arrived the day before I had to fly to Pittsburgh for a work trip. I was super excited to sit alone on the plane and just read and I knew from reading his hilarious blog that it was going to be a great read. Let me first say, what I didn’t expect was to be LAUGHING OUT LOUD on the plane.

When it comes to humor, there is the more normal kind of funny when reading – the one where you sorta just quietly laugh or smile – and with that, I feel the writer has succeeded; they make you feel better for just having read what they’ve written. And trust me, I respect that kind of writing because I know how hard it is to write humor.

But then there is the kind of funny where you bust out laughing. You might even be snorting. And you don’t care because it’s that funny. There were parts of Adrian’s book, which took about 2 seconds to suck me in btw, where I was likely snorting. On the very quiet plane, let’s not forget.

And while we are talking about emotional extremes, he also made me tear up. Note: I don’t love crying, so I don’t always come by that one as easily as maybe I would a giggle or a small laugh.

When the book first arrived, I admit, I chalked it up as a book for Dads. Mr. Wired Momma himself said “I think I’m going to read it” – which also intrigued me because he is a man who generally doesn’t read about parenting (it’s safe to say I’m not sure he even reads this brilliant and world renown site on parenting) – but he could tell it appealed to him. But I had the first go at it because I wanted to share it with my readers (see how you come first?).

What I didn’t expect was how genuinely fun and interesting it would be, as a mom, to read a book written strictly from a dad’s perspective. All too often, we are reading other women’s blogs or books about parenting or a pediatrician’s guide. If you are anything like me, you probably haven’t read a ton written strictly from the dad perspective. Adrian nails it – both in his honestly and his ability to recount small but important details that bring you back to that moment in your transition to parenthood.

Honestly, one of my favorite parts of the book was the chapter on the delivery of his daughter, particularly the level of detail involved in setting the scene, including his likening a doctor to Randy Jackson and coming ill-prepared without his birthing play list. He not only transported me back to that moment in my own delivery (though we had no one even remotely similar to Randy Jackson in our delivery room) but I also enjoyed rehashing those moments from a Dad’s perspective.

Look, I want to get to my actual interview with Adrian, which he rightfully noted didn’t give him a chance to be funny because I instead asked him serious (and totally nosy) questions. So let’s cut to the chase. This book is a no-brainer gift for Father’s Day. It is not just a book for “new dads” because any dad can related to what Adrian shares. It’s also a book for moms. Especially nosy ones like me, who enjoy hearing from a man’s perspective, and also for anyone who loves to laugh. The other thing about Adrian’s book is this – his life hasn’t gone as planned. Has anyone’s? It takes courage to put it all out there and share the roller coaster of emotions that come with becoming a parent for the first time, hitting career bumps, adjusting to life in a totally different way than you’d ever imagined, and being able to laugh at yourself along the way. So please, read on to hear about life as a Stay-At-Home Dad but also – let’s support this fabulous local blogger and author – and pick up his book on Amazon right here for $11. You absolutely will be glad you did.

With that, let’s hear from Adrian:

WM: How did you pull off writing a book while being at home full-time?

ADRIAN: This was really tricky. It took some major sacrifices from me, and my wife. I had almost a year to write the book, but spent the first six months ‘percolating’ about it. The second six months were spent writing on paper towels at naptime, falling asleep on the toilet and staring at my computer screen with bloodshot eyes at 2am.

WM: Is the fascination and intrigue with SAHD’s waning as we are seeing more and more men around during “business hours” – whether it be because they have flexible work arrangements, work from home, or are SAHDs? Or no?

ADRIAN: I hope not, otherwise I might not sell a second book!

Truthfully, I think that while full-time stay-at-home dads are more prevalent (we’ve doubled in the last decade) these days, our numbers are relatively low.I don’t know that the fascination and/or intrigue is waning perse, even though it’s been thirty years since Mr. Mom came out. I think we’re still struggling (as a group) to defeat the stereotype that pegs us as ‘bumbling and aloof’. Kind of a shame.

WM: Can you really call yourself a SAHD when you authored a book and maintain a blog?

ADRIAN: I don’t know what I am anymore… some kind of freak, maybe. I’m sure that there are plenty of other parents out there that are taking care of their kids full-time and also pursuing an interest or career on the side. I wonder how they classify themselves?

For the longest time, I was introducing myself ONLY as a stay-at-home dad, because that’s my job for ten hours a day. It wasn’t until a few months ago when my wife interrupted me and said, “You’re not just a SAHD, you’re a writer. You get paid to write.”

I guess the bottom line is, these days when someone asks me what I do, I have to tell them all of it. Being a stay-at-home parent for two toddlers won’t ever get ‘glossed over’ in conversation just because it doesn’t sound glamorous or pay big bucks – it’s one of the toughest jobs I’ve ever had.

WM: What was the adjustment like for you – transitioning to being home after such a demanding career in LA?

ADRIAN: I actually talk about this in my book. I didn’t do so well. Perhaps it’s because I’m a guy… I don’t know. My position was eliminated unexpectedly when my daughter was only a few weeks old. I didn’t see it coming. My life went from 150 miles an hour to 2, in a flash. My pride, self-esteem and self-worth were all challenged. It took me awhile to understand the importance and value of what I was doing. And I’d be lying if I told you that I didn’t find myself a little depressed while I was trying to figure it out.

WM: Do you find the balance of work at home is shared between you and your wife? Women tend to gripe that their husbands don’t do as much as they do on the home front – whether they are full-time working moms or part-time working moms or SAHMs…so I’ve often wondered how it plays out in situations where the dad is home.

ADRIAN: Are you trying to get me divorced… or killed? What kind of question is this?

It’s difficult to say where my job starts and stops. I don’t get in my car and go to an office. The whole house is my office.

Sure, I gripe. I sometimes feel like I do the same freakin’ thing – week in, week out. I’m constantly doing laundry, dishes and picking up after people.

Do I think the balance of work at home is shared? Yes. Do I think it’s shared ‘equally’? No. But I wouldn’t expect that. My wife works A LOT. Is the work shared equally when we’re both home? Yes. I do as much as I possibly can during the day, so the little time that we have together at night when I’m not writing, can be spent relaxing and hanging out together.

—————————————————

Thank you Adrian for your honesty and indulging my questions. Here’s the bottom line – Adrian’s book is an excellent, honest, hilarious and entertaining read. Please pick one up for the dads in your life. Be sure to follow Adrian on his blog Dad or Alive, or find him on Facebook. And as always, I’d love for you to hit “Like” on the old Wired Momma FB page while you’re at it.

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Humor, Husbands