Category Archives: Motherhood

Pot Parents

Did anyone else catch the opinion piece this weekend in the New York Times about how smoking pot makes one father a better dad?

Vacations without children make me a better mom.

Sometimes I think alcohol makes me a better mom…or at least it gives me an excuse to keep enjoying my beverage and pretending I don’t hear the epic battle between siblings unfolding in the next room over My Little Ponies.

Anyhow, the article was interesting, in moi’s opinion, because this father was given medical marijuana for back pain and his path to discovery led him to find that not only did it free him of his pain but it unleashed more patience in him, more interest in his children and more creativity to actually play with them.

You could say that whatever it takes to be a better dad, is a good thing because we all know children benefit from undivided attention and play time with parents.

You could also say get over yourself and recognize that you chose to become a parent and no one ever said it was going to be easy or that you’d have any time to yourself – so suck it up and play a little and pack up your patience because that’s your job.

You could say that smoking a little doobie isn’t likely to harm anyone.

Just like uncorking the bottle of wine at the end of a long day in the comforts of your own home isn’t likely to harm anyone.

Except when the day comes when you need it.

Then it’s an addiction.

Or when the day comes when the toddlers suddenly aren’t innocent clueless cherubs anymore but suddenly they are savvy tweens and they wonder why mommy needs to her wine every day or why daddy isn’t fun to hang out with unless he smokes his joint.

Then it’s a little more complicated.

So what do you say? Think smoking dope would make you a better parent? Or do you think this father is on a slippery slope? Especially now that we have medical marijuana in DC? And is this something you consider as you pour your wine with dinner or do you instead think that teaching kids moderation by modeling the behavior is the best way to role model?  Look – I grew up most of my life in Europe – so I have pretty liberal views specifically with drinking in front of kids – but I’d love to know if others read this piece and what you all think.

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Today’s Topic: All About Lice

Today’s public service announcement is brought to you from…..MOI. Ain’t life grand?

Look, I can’t help but notice the search traffic to my site is increasingly driven by those looking for information about LICE. Ahh…lice…..our mortal enemy. The equal opportunity offender. I have survived this epidemic. C’est vrai. And in the spirit of school starting soon and kids returning from summer camp infested with lice…yes, it can happen to your clean child too, I thought that I can only bring to you this very informative post in the event you suspect lice in your pipsqueaks. Even if you don’t, please read below. Denial, as I’ve learned, is never a good thing when it comes to lice.

And so….my post with the lice expert (yes, she exists) from this exact time last year.

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Ahh….it’s that time of year…that time that many of us think will never come….Back-to-School! And with the return of the cherubs to school comes that never-ending, itchy scratchy problem that if you’ve never had, you pray you never will, and if you’ve never had, you probably think you only get when you’re a dirty, lazy parent…..LICE. Lice. The great equalizer. Lice. The equal opportunity offender. Lice. It happens to the best of us.

Don't fake it, we all look like this when we realize our kid has lice

And so, for today’s expert series, I turned to none other than the lice expert in Montgomery County. The woman who saved me in a dark phase of my life exactly one year ago when I realized that my child wasn’t scratching her head because she was hot and needed to pull it back (denial is never a good thing when it comes to lice), my child was scratching her head because it was infested with lice. And despite what I might have thought before, lice does happen to people who are clean and anal and attentive. I introduce you to Karen Franco of Advice on Lice in Kensington, MD. Without a doubt, my money spent at Advice on Lice was some of the best money I ever spent. Is your head itchy yet? Cause it will be by the time you are mid-way through our very helpful interview but well, an ounce of prevention does us all a world of good as we gear up to send the kiddo’s back to school in less than two weeks. Karen and her husband now run a full-time business checking heads for lice, educating parents on what to do, and generally being life-savers in your time of need when lice hits the house. Karen got started in the lice business 15 years ago when her daughter was young, she used to volunteer to do head checks, and was appalled with the stigma attached with lice and how unwilling people were to acknowledge it and do something about it. Her experience evolved into an in-demand local small business. Karen and her husband not only check families for lice, they educate you on what to do and give you the steps you need to take to make sure you eradicate it completely from your house. I won’t lie, it’s definitely work intensive but I survived…so read on for some great advice.

Karen, is there a peak time of year for lice?

Yes. Back-to-school is definitely a peak time of year for lice. Because of summer camps and people traveling, there are cross-over populations and people are sharing lice. All summer long, we are distracted – which is partly where some of the denial comes in that you mentioned – we think it must be allergies or dandruff which is absurd but people don’t want their summer disrupted.

How do we know it’s not dandruff?

Dandruff will blow off easily. It flakes. There is a mis-conception about lice – people think they are greyish white but that is misleading – they are transparent, a milky color and the nit is glued onto the hair, you have to scrape it off, whereas dandruff flakes off.

Let’s talk more about the role of denial and lice. I am very guilty of this. This time last year, my eldest walked around scratching her head like crazy for easily 2 weeks. I didn’t want to accept that it could be lice, and because we’d never had it before, while I did check her head, I didn’t really know what I was looking for and her hair is very thick. It wasn’t until there were bugs actually hopping that I had to accept this child had lice. I feel like sleep away camp is a big problem with lice and going back-to -school. Do you find this about sleep-away camp?

Yes. Kids go to sleep-away camp and often get lice. And many of the camps actually screen them when they arrive and if they find lice, send them home, which leaves upset children. Some parents bring them to see us for a head check as soon as they pick the kids up from sleep away camp. The bottom line is there is no magic potion to make lice go away – there is no smell that repels them.

So what can we do to prevent lice?

Get a fine tooth comb and comb their hair on a regular basis. Make it part of your weekly routine and that is your best prevention.  Prevention is getting the lice out before it takes root and sets up a family. I recommend the Lice Meister comb and brushing through the child’s hair twice a day, once in the morning and once in the evening. You can order the comb online. I have one client who has made combing through her child’s hair part of their family routine by starting and ending the week with the comb throughs. Every Monday and every Friday, she sits down her child, uses some conditioner, and combs through from the scalp to the end of the hair. The public schools here believe that lice is a nuisance and because it is not life threatening, you don’t have to keep your child home from school, but that doesn’t help anyone. The bottom line is, it’s prudent to designate a day to look through everyone’s hair every week. It is never appropriate to say your child can’t miss school and you will just let it go.

So, you find out your child has lice – so then what? What do you do?

First let me say that the homeopathic treatments are not based on science, they are not effective. You need chemicals to kill the lice. I recommend Rid and I recommend that my clients leave it on their heads for longer than 10 minutes, which is what it says on the box. I advise clients to leave it on for a minimum of 30 minutes to kill all the live bugs. The method that we lay out on our web site has been validated time and time again. The problem is that the live bugs are the contagious ones, they crawl, they know they want to be in the human head. There are so many mis-informed theories out there about how to kill lice. One really common one is putting olive oil on your head and sleeping all night with it – that does not kill the lice. The lice breathe through pores and they can close their pores for up to 18 hours, so sleeping with olive oil doesn’t kill the lice. And then – you have to comb through the hair. The comb that comes with the RID is a joke. They do not work. You have to use a fine tooth comb, like the Lice Meister. Parents of boys often shave their son’s head and that will get rid of the lice.

What about if you are pregnant or have very young children – what product should you use that will still kill the lice but doesn’t have chemicals?

There is a new prescription medication that has no pesticides called Ulesfia. It’s not meant for anyone under 6 months. Because the product is new, we recommend using less product than prescribed the first time and then using it again 10 days later. Many pharmacies don’t carry it but the pharmacy in our building does carry it.

Are we all itchy yet?? But seriously, having lived through this, I was cursing all the stuffed animals we owned as I put them in the dryer and bagged them for a few weeks. How long do they live when they are not on a head? And what about car seats?

A healthy adult female or male can live for about 1.5 days, depending on where it is. The nits will die within an hour or so. If your child has been in the car seat and it’s summer time, the bug will be dead in the hot car within 2-3 hours. The bottom line is the head is where they live, they are not infecting your car, carpets, your home. They can’t do their important activities anywhere beyond the head, so what I urge people to do is spend their time focusing on combing the hair with a proper fine-tooth comb.

So Karen, as we embark on the school year, can you tell us how much your services cost and give us some parting words of wisdom?

Yes, we charge $85/hour or $20 for a screening. All the products we recommend are available in our store. We can go to people’s homes but children are usually much better behaved when not at home and in our offices and we are just better equipped with the seating and lighting in our office.  Also, I think it is important to teach children about lice in terms of “life sciences” to help eliminate the stigma attached with lice and really teach prevention and education. As for parting words of wisdom, I like to say “When in doubt, comb it out.”

Those are excellent final words from Karen. So moms, when in doubt, comb it out……and call Karen. And remember, denial is never a good thing when it comes to lice.  Finally, if you liked today’s WM Expert Series, please “Like” Wired Momma on Facebook or look to the right and subscribe…it’s an easy way to keep up with future fabulous local mom expert interviews and well, other random things we discuss here.

Parenting: A Week in Pictures with some link love

Another busy summer week….lots of painting….prepping for “vacation” job re-location next week…so today….I bring you another one of the ever-popular Parenting week in pictures..whereby I troll other funny people’s Facebook pages and share it with you….along with an original of my very own. With that, let the games begin:

I love this one because frankly, when I’m pissed (read: annoyed with Mr. Wired Momma), my initial reaction might be to stick my face in a jar of Nutella but then my quick second reaction is this:

I realize it is not very mature. But it can be very therapeutic.

You would have to be new here to not know why I find that one endlessly amusing. And odds are, because you are reading my blog, you also find that funny.

Seriously. No more comments needed.

Now, this one generated quite a fun reaction on the super popular, always fun, don’t want to miss it Wired Momma Facebook page, so for you other dear readers who are missing out on all the fun – please chime in – which would you choose?

Sad but true…I actually weighed the pros and cons for about two days and personally finally reached my conclusion. I would go for the shoes. Deep, I know.

Finally, some original WM photo work here. The other night, I was trolling the aisles of Whole Foods, blissfully alone, when I remembered I’d run out of vitamins for the little Wired Momma’ettes. As my hand reached down to grab our favorite kids vitamins, what appeared before my wondering eyes? Why it wasn’t 8 tiny reindeer and a jolly old elf..but close…it was THIS:

Wait a minute.

For a mere $13.99, for all these years, I could have just avoided all the yelling and threatening and bribing and coaxing of the insane toddlers who invaded my home and instead I could have had a CALM CHILD.

Really, Whole Foods?

Please, speak up, if you’ve tried this product and can vouch for it. If so, there might be a stampede to Whole Foods. I’ll trip you on the way in.

Finally, before you bum rush the nearest Whole Foods to calm your child….I urge you to read Petula Dvorak’s interesting piece on Olympian Moms...and how they just might have it all.  Oh, and “Like” my page.

 

 

Choreplay

For today’s entertainment, I am resurrecting an old post that dates back to January 30, 2008….but sometimes an oldie is a goodie…and it keeps with our discussion last week of our Homes Rising up to greet us. Today’s focus is on the husband……

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Today’s entry is for you, American Husband. And the funny thing is, what you are about to read below reflects an exact conversation that took place in my house just on Sunday evening. I looked over and imagine my surprise when I noticed Mr. Wired Momma sitting on the couch, folding laundry – all on his own volition – and even better – pairing socks. I had to splash water on my face and pinch my cheeks a few times.

This is exactly what me and Mr. WM look like. Seriously.

Once I realized it was really happening, I wasn’t having a wet dream, I took the liberty of letting him know that I’d go roll in the hay right then and there – that’s the only kind of foreplay I need.

He scoffed at me. He really didn’t realize I was serious. I even went on to explain that I’ve told him this before and that all husbands seem to miss this memo – despite how glaringly obvious it is – that if they were to take charge with household chores with regularity – they’d get us into bed a lot more frequently.

He really thought this ludicrous. At that point, I gave up. He was looking a gift horse in the mouth. It was like I was speaking in tongues to him.

And then a friend the link to a word in the Urban Dictionary, a site I’d never even heard of until yesterday and now, a marital relations expert in my mind:

1. choreplay
When a woman is turned on by the sight of her husband/boyfriend/partner doing regular household chores, that she would normally be doing. 

“Last night, it was all about choreplay. I was all ‘OH YEAH, fold that laundry. Oh yes, just like that! In half and, then in half again. OHHH'”

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=choreplay&defid=2812396

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