Category Archives: Celebrities

No celeb is safe on Kitty Time

National Life Goes as Planned for Mom’s Week: The Final Act

Bon Matin spring Cheri’s –

Here we are on the final day of our special week all for ourselves. And because we’ve spent the week focusing on ourselves and enjoying our life, with no surprises, the life where everything is working out as planned and no extra stress, me thinks the rest of the week’s news might have gotten away from you all. And far be it from a KT reader to be behind today’s news, so with that, I will bring you the week’s roundup, and then encourage you to resume the final act of focusing on you today!

With that, let’s roll up our sleeves and begin. First, with politics.

By now, we’ve all heard that Elizabeth Edwards’ cancer is back but John is still in the campaign. All we can do is hope Elizabeth keeps up the good fight, and continue watching and admiring our boy Edwards as he stomps around the country.  But let’s get back to what the man in the White House has been up too. KT’s mom just tipped me off to a hilarious one liner Chris Rock had recently on SNL. Apparently he took the liberty of pointing out that the country is ready for a black President because we currently have a retarded one.  Indeed, hardly politically correct, but any slam against the President is a funny one for moi.

And no where else is the President’s inability to be a leader more evident than in the current Gonzales scandal. For anyone who’s keeping track, apparently this is just another example of the President and his lemmings (or rather, Rove and his lemming, the President) casting aside good government employees because they disagree with the Administration. This might not be a democracy according to our President. But the way it is playing out is classic Bush Playbook Strategy. KT has received an exclusive glimpse into the aforementioned Playbook:

1. If any high powered government employee (CIA Agent, Ambassadors, Federal Prosecutors) disagrees with our President, fire, maim or eliminate them immediately.  

2. If the public or Congress dare challenge this decision, make sure President comes out in full support of the Cabinet Secretary who oversees said fired employee, while maintaining that like everything else in his life, he just had no idea what was going on.

3. Then make sure that someone else is fired to hope it cleans up the mess. It doesn’t matter who the fall guy is, so long as it’s not Rove or Cheney. No one cares if Gonzales, Plame or Libby are outed or sent to jail, so long as the Three Kings are safe. (Bush, Rove and Cheney).

 Kittens, I can’t tell you where I got this information from, but it’s a confirmed White House source close to the President, I swear. It’s true. And on that note, you heard it here first, Gonzales will quietly step down during Easter Recess.

But enough on politics. How about some celeb gossip?

Back to Brit. She is out of rehab, KFed took her sons to see her, and apparently the details of their divorce settlement are leaking and KFed is set to get somewhere between $1-$9 million:  http://www.trent.blogspot.com/

If you are a millionairess – be sure to hire Brit’s lawyer to set up your prenup, is really the best lesson we can all take away from this.

Angie’s plane landed safely back in LA yesterday and we can all continue to wonder why Zahara and Maddox got to go with her to Vietnam to pick up Pax, but Shiloh was forced to stay back with her daddy. One wonders, does Angie even really like Shiloh? I think she’s discovered that she finds babies boring and prefers toddlers. Particularly toddlers that didn’t come out of her.

http://www.splashnewsonline.com/2007/03/22/angelina-jolie-gives-a-new-life-for-pax-thien/

For those of you who love Leo, rumors are that he’s off the market. I, for one, can’t stand the guy. I think he looks like a greasy 16 year old but some fans have informed me that I’ll change my mind once I see “The Departed.”

http://perezhilton.com/topics/leonardo_dicaprio/headline_of_the_week_weak_20070322.php

And finally, it seems that Desperate Housewive’s hottie Jesse Metcalf is joining the rest of young Hollywood in the new catwalk, he’s entered into rehab:

 http://www.nypost.com/seven/03222007/gossip/pagesix/private_rehab_for_metcalfe_pagesix_.htm

I think he should log onto: www.b4udrink.org and learn a few things. Or maybe he will sign up to be the new hot driver of the sweet educational van on this very important site.

And finally, back to the week of celebrating ourselves and no surprises, the USA Today includes this snapshot in today’s paper that might make us all feel a little warm and fuzzy inside:

http://www.usatoday.com/news/snapshot.htm?section=M&label=2007-03-23-income

And with that, kittens, I trust you will have a wonderful weekend, I hope you have Baby Happy Hour plans lined up for this evening, and don’t feel down on Monday morning when you log on and find nothing new from moi….KT has to do a bit of work travel….so be patient, and know that I will have something extra special for you by Tuesday.

Kisses.

Spring in my step

Good morning Kittens –

I’m not sure where you are logging in from, but from where I’m typing, it’s allegedly going to be 80 degrees today. This spring weather makes everything seem right. I can even laugh about the invasion of mice in my house.

Oh mais oui. C’est vrai. Yesterday morning, out of the corner of my eye, I saw something small and brown scurry across my kitchen floor. Naturally my husband thought I was making the whole thing up. My sister even doubted me. My darling daughter was my only supporter and well, that could be because she didn’t really know what we were talking about. I even began to doubt myself when the day came and went and nothing….no more mice appearances…until about 10pm last night….the mouse met his maker. And then this morning, his cousin met the same fate. Here’s hoping that’s the last of that drama chez moi.

But again, it’s warm, my daffodils are almost blooming. My tulips and hyacinths are actually coming up, I planted them as bulbs in the spring, apparently I planted them right side up (something I worried about) and the squirrels didn’t dig them out. And my new nanny starts Monday. So really, what’s a few dead mice?

And so, with this warm spring weather, I will bring to you today the latest in celebrity gossip. When it’s warm and sunny, I can’t be anything but light and flippant. No serious topics need apply today.

So let’s get started kittens.

First up: Tori Spelling.

I really can’t stand her. She’s ugly. She’s annoying and well, not a good actress. But, in keeping with the celebrity theme of babies being the new black, she delivered a baby boy last night:

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20004211,00.html

One KittyTime fan reported that Tori got pregnant in the first place, for money. Yes. This fan claims that Tori’s dad spelled out a time period in which she would receive more money, in the event of his death, if she became impregnated. I do not even have a link to support this juicy and awful rumor – but well, we love rumors here at KittyTime. Especially unsubstantiated ones about spoiled celebs we don’t particularly like – so chew on that one, if you will.

Next up: our favorite Sex & The City Star, Sarah Jessica Parker, is launching a new fashion line today called Bitten:

http://www.postchronicle.com/news/original/article_21269010.shtml

I have no idea what the style will be like, where they will be sold, if they will be as funky as her Carrie Bradshaw outfits, or what the price points will be, but I’m sure we’ll hear all about it later today.

And really, you must know that I am saving the best for last.

Our dear friend Britney. It seems that even the mea-culpa of postpartum couldn’t save her.  It seems that the reality is that she isn’t ready to be saved and she isn’t ready to face her demons because if she were, well, then she wouldn’t be photographed with her bald head and a cigarette hanging out of her mouth – hardly screaming mother of the year. Mais non. If she wanted to be saved, we’d only see pictures of her dutifully wearing some kind of wig and opening her arms wide for an embrace as little Sean P runs towards his mummy, desperate for her affection after their long separation. No cigs in sight. No red bull. And certainly no rumors of a rehab romance.

You got it. Rehab romance is now circling the Britney rumor mill. She is apparently mixing it up with some no name rocker dude in rehab and is rumored to leave early – she is all cured now that she’s found a man.  Somehow, Brit has gone from being a poster child for the modern day feminist movement, the wronged child star/mother of children, suffering with postpartum, crying out for help – to being an absentee mom who’s main priority is finding a new man…with a little coke mixed in….with that tequila chaser….to help her time with him pass real nice and smooth:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17521716/

Me thinks even finding religion this time won’t help her. But stay tuned……..

Week’s Roundup

It’s Friday again…time for a weekly round-up of the latest news, celeb gossip, personal drama, and plans for baby happy hour. With that, let’s roll up our sleeves and begin, kittens.

1. It’s always opposite day for the Republicans. The party of Christian values. The party of faith, family and all things sanctimonious in this world. Anyone else throwing up a little bit in their mouth, right along with me? Sure, it should be enough that we’ve been engaged in a civil war that started on nothing but bald faced lies spewed from the mouth of our dear leader, the lying, good for nothing, not even that smart, former Coke addict. Then comes the party’s love of family. You know, nothing would terrorize the sanctimony of marriage more than allowing gays to marry, and yet, apparently providing healthcare for children, and proper free public education really isn’t that important.

Because they preach values. Again, back to the family, family values. And who was a better whipping boy than Bill Clinton? A man we all know, does NOT represent the sanctimony of marriage. But the Republican leaders – THEY would never disavow their marraiges. Mais non!

Until something young and cute comes along and they hope everyone else is looking the other way, like say, paying attention to former President Clinton. Anyone thinking of Newt right about now?  Because the news of his affair that took place while he was busy lambasting Clinton for his affair, is really fun news, people.

Let’s all just remember that the only thing the Republicans do better than the Democrats, is campaign. And well, that didn’t even turn out to be true in this year’s mid-term elections. So here’s hoping our fellow countrymen are maybe paying attention to the fact that the Republican party thinks we’re all too stupid to recognize that they really don’t stand for anything they say they do.  They can say what they want – but they are not the party of family values and it’s time they stopped hiding behind religion.

2. Celebrity news. I’m bored with Britney. I’m sawing logs over the idea of talking about Anna Nicole anymore. I couldn’t care less about stupid Nicole Ritchie and her hospitalization over “dehydration.” (read: she’s starving herself). I’m even bored by the news of Angie’s latest adoption. It’s not that exciting out there people. Salma is proving that once again, in the celebrity world, babies are the new black – what with news of her pregnancy. There are rumors that Sarah Michelle Gellar is preggo. And even looser rumors that Gisele is preggo with Brady’s baby. Believe what you will kittens, but it is fun to talk. Oh, and apparently Madonna doesn’t believe in infant car seat safety, taking a page out of Britney’s book, because she apparently is too busy to strap little David into a car seat: www.tmz.com

3. And finally, childcare continues to be the reason behind my deep need for baby happy hour tonight. For those of you hoping for an update on the saga chez moi, here it is. It’s really not for the faint of heart. Yesterday I started my new approach, which is to call the day of the interview to re-confirm the interview time. And once I hire someone, I just might call them every day until they start, to confirm they are starting. So, I called and confirmed, then proceeded to scramble to get a ton of work done because I needed to leave early to get home for the interview. Only to have the prospective new nanny call me five minutes before our scheduled interview time and inform me she just accepted a position with someone else.

Lesson: things are looking up in my house because at least this one had the common courtesy to call.

Bon Weekend, my pretties.