For everyone with a rising Kindergartener, this post, now two years old, is for you. But wait – everyone else – it’s also for you. Turns out, for me at least, shedding a few tears behind my sunglasses when they board that bus the first day didn’t end after Kindergarten, here we go again as she heads off to 2nd grade.
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“They grow up so fast!” – does it not seem that everyone preaches this to you when you are a bleary-eyed, sleep-deprived, hormonal, chubby, cranky new mom?
What does that mean, I used to wonder. I would stare at my baby wrapped like a burrito and swear with each passing minute that I would never again sleep uninterrupted. I wouldn’t shower with ease. I wouldn’t know what an impromptu night out on the town would mean. I would be trapped by this small cute blob that basically always needed something but didn’t give much back.
“Oh, she’s so adorable. Enjoy it now! It doesn’t last…”
I know, I know, I would snark in my head thinking of cruel things to bark back at this well-intentioned stranger….I know….they grow up so fast. They all do except mine, who won’t sleep and really fusses at inconvenient times.
I hated that cliché. I hated it as much as I hated “Sleep when the baby sleeps”
You know why I hated that one? Because I TRIED but she didn’t sleep LONG ENOUGH….where could I get the kid who slept when mommy slept? Why didn’t someone put that one on the menu? Aren’t they supposed to obey and respect their mother’s wishes?
But then came Monday. When my sweet smiling baby went from this:
Will she really ever grow up?
to this:
I never agreed to this happening so fast
In the blink of an eye.
I swear it was like someone pressed the fast-forward button times 5 and there went my sweet tramadol girl, proudly wearing the fall 2011 kindergarten accessory, the pinned on name tag identifying her name, her teacher and the color of her bus. With barely a glance back, she boarded that school bus and was off.
I totally cried behind my sunglasses, cursing that stupid cliché for being as right as it is annoying. And then what did I do? It was like I was out to torture myself on Monday. I should have just gotten out a knife and taken up cutting.
On Saturday, pre-over-hyped (though we did lose our power) Irene, we went out and purchased a full size bed for our 2.5 year-old. I noticed her in the crib last week and realized how ridiculous it was that she was still being imprisoned. So big girl bed delivery was scheduled for Tuesday. So what made more sense than to head to Babies’R’Us on Monday and purchase a side rail for the big girl bed.
Does that make sense to you? If it does, then you probably haven’t been in that store in a few years, like I hadn’t.
Immediately after crossing the threshold, I was drowned and suffocated by sweet baby smell, small cute baby onesies, little tiny size N diapers, cute little Halloween costumes….and there I was to purchase something to render my home cribless…..a mere 24 hours after my oldest started Kindergarten…..the extra small baby things were mocking me. They were cooing and giggling and smelling good….
Could I get pregnant just standing there, I wondered? How could I not realize that going from Kindergarten to Cribless in the same week is just too much for a gal to take? What will the nursery look like without the beaver-chewed up sides of the wooden crib anchoring the room?
How did this happen?
(Friends…don’t forget to “Like” Wired Momma on FB to keep up with my rants and raves…I usually am not so emotional!)
Monica! this is so good … i loved reading it. i’m feeling so much the same. as my littlest dude (not yet 2.5 but almost) is asking for a big boy bed and i’m keeping him “imprisoned” i relate big time. seeing Gwen get on the bus was magical and horrifying. and going to the baby store definitely reduces me to the same tangle of feelings. how perfectly you capture it, and how delightfully plain you put things. love your writing! thanks for this.
You made me cry on the way to a meeting! What an emotional week it is to let these “babies” get on that big bus. Having just my almost 4 year old with me the last couple days, I have been noticing how much I am babying her in some ways, trying to slow down the inevitable. Oh my goodness. Great post!
Sorry for dragging others down with me! I think the only way to compensate for my rare emotional post is to follow-it up with one that trashes husbands. Hint: how long do we think the crib will remain dismantled in my hallway for?
Thank you so much for actually saying out loud, albeit via a post, what I’m thinking most of the time. As a first time mom to a 9 month old I always seem to be tired and cranky. But everyone, from my mother to strangers on the street, continually tell me how wonderful this time is and to cherish my little one. Please don’t get me wrong, I love my daughter with my whole heart and soul, but I do not enjoy getting up 2-3 times a night, being spit-up on, or spending an hour ever night in a battle of will’s to get her to eat dinner. I often feel so guilty for having negative thoughts, like I must be a bad parent because I don’t enjoy these nightly interruptions or showers of spit up. No one says being a mom some times sucks, we might all think it but we don’t usually have the guts to say it.
[…] two months ago, my oldest started Kindergarten and we moved my youngest into a big girl bed. Dismantling the crib and sending a kid off on a school bus in the span of 48 hours was too much […]
My oldest daughter starts KG next week and I am feeling both happy and sad… to say the least. Thanks for writing what I’m sure are totally un-original feelings felt by mom’s everywhere but it’s the first time for me.
It really is true. Remember this gem
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/glennon-melton/dont-carpe-diem_b_1206346.html
I swear the more fun & interesting my kids become the the faster time flies.
Sometimes I wonder I should have had another (no!), but it wouldn’t help with the other 2 growing up any slower.
I cry every year. Today I’m counting down the minutes ’til they return and can tell me all about their days. I perused old pictures last night and misted up at my long gone babies.
And then I got into bed and slept 8 uninterrupted hours. If my littlest were in school, I could (theoretically) stay in bed ALL DAMN DAY if I wanted to. Thinking of this, the tears quickly dried and I started counting down the days until S starts kindergarten.